I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
