Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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