doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
It's Friday. Sex?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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