WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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