at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
