I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize