My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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