I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
