no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
