Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize