Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
