You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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