Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
