Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
You took a bar mat shot.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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