He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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