dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
