Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
