ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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