This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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