Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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