yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
God, I missed his penis.
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