Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
