there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
