i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
