The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
