Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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