You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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