He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize