you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Randomize
