I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
