and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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