i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
