So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
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