on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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