Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
