Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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