i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I don't think brook has ever known best
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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