i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
