Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Terrible idea I love it
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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