I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
