Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
