You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
