He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
