That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
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