The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
