Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize