For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
