So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize