coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
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