So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize
