love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
how does that bad decision feel?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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